Mr Eejit was an eeijit. He wis boarn an eejit. And noo at the graund auld age o sixty, he wis a bigger eejit than ever. In The Twits, Roald Dahl's story about the world's most revolting couple, Mr Twit was horrible and hairy and his wife Mrs Twit was just plain ugly. Now in The Eejits they are honkin, maukit, bowfin and clarty and Mrs Eejit's hackitness is revealed in all its manky glory. Read Matthew Fitt's new translation of this children's classic to find out what sleekit terrible things the